Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Mission Impossible

After reading Seth Godin's blog posting about really bad mission statements, I wanted to attempt to generate the World's Worst Mission Statement ever! It appears that some companies have already made attempts to wordsmith their way to corporate mediocrity, intentionally or unintentionally.

I find it best to be shrouded in a mysterious enigma of psycho-babble in order to effectively set a course for a company. This one definitely takes the cake.

In attempting to generate the World's Worst Mission Statement I really felt that the less energy expended the better. I wanted to prove that in 5 minutes I could generate a paragraph of wish-washy verbiage that most companies would take a year to build. So with the help of a few tools, ( the corporate bs generator, wordlab, google) I present the World's Worst Mission Statement!

(fanfare)

MegaMicroSystems

Advanced. Technology. Strategy.


Mission Statement

MegaMicroSystems is a key industry player with global tangible assets, strategic allied partnerships, and a information-driven technology base. We utilize user-centric methodologies, grow visionary systems, and orchestrate strategic functionalities in order to generate successful customer and end-user experiences. The ultimate goal for our targeted client base is to allow them to implement world-class synergies, generate end-to-end communities, and launch successful implemented platforms.

My brain hurts.

Think about it... and please utilize your targeted synergies properly.